A Moment Of Reflection.

It feels momentous because it is. It's okay to feel sad or to feel nothing at all. What have we learnt from the past 24 hours, about our own emotions?

Dark clouds reflecting the mood of the Nation. Photo by Vijendra Singh on Unsplash

Last night, as I sat with a glass of cold white wine in my hands, the TV showed old photos and video clips from times before I was even born. It showed occasions I remember too, historic moments that we have all been through together. The rain beat against the window outside. How fitting, as if it knew…

And as I sat, absorbing the sad news, for some reason my mind drifted off to a time from my childhood when I would watch SMTV on a weekend morning.

Funny where our minds take us isn’t it?

I was taken back to a Saturday morning as a child. Did you ever watch “Chums”?

It was a series of sketches, parodying the popular “Friends” and starred Ant, Dec and Cat Deeley. I had a quick Google to see when this actually aired and immediately felt old. The first episode aired in 1999.

My brother and I were never allowed to watch TV before school, so this felt like a luxury on a Saturday morning, to be able to take full control of the four channels whilst eating our morning biscuits and milk.

As I started to reminisce about our mornings in front of the television, I found myself wishing for a brief moment I could time travel back to that time.

A time when SMTV was the go to show for kids up and down the country.

A time when I didn’t worry constantly about food shopping, the rising cost of living or keeping everyone happy.

A time where Christmas was counted down to excitedly without the stress of present buying and food preparation.

A time when the Queen was still alive.

“Grief is the price we pay for love.” ~ Queen Elizabeth II

My favourite quote taken from one of the many poignant speeches delivered by Her Majesty; this particular line was following the September 11th attacks in 2001.

Whether you support the Royal family or not, I’m sure the passing of HM Queen Elizabeth II, will have touched many hearts and will continue to do so over the coming days and weeks.

We will feel sad. We will smile as memories are shared. Words are powerful. We will feel numb or like the atmosphere has changed some how. Because it isn’t just about losing a member of the Royal family. The Nations (or indeed the world’s) loss, is a stark reminder that no one is invincible; not even the Queen.

Life ends eventually, unpredictable and sometimes unfairly shorter for some, and how we choose to spend our time here is more precious than we probably believe. So while I find myself casting my mind back to my childhood more and more each day, I think it is important to look ahead. Use those memories and experiences from days past to determine our future.

I don’t want this to become too morbid.

On this particular occasion we have much to celebrate. A long life that touched so many hearts. A new future that will be very different for ourselves and may take some getting used to, but will actually be the normal for our children.

My youngest daughter will have no memory of the Queen at all. Which I think is sad but she won’t. That’s not her future. And so life carries on. But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t take a moment to grieve. To feel sad.

If you want to cry? Cry.

Want to move on and switch off from the news? Go for it.

We deal with these things in our own, different ways. But we must remain respectful and kind to others. And that is exactly what I will be repeating to my children. If I lead by example, surely they will follow. Just as the Queen was the comfort for many through dark times. The light has gone but the flame still burns; Her legacy lives on. Together we unite and hold each other through the upheaval, twists and turns of life.

Rest In Peace Ma’am.

Photo by Mark de Jong on Unsplash